Friendship with the World
Adulterers
and adulteresses! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with
God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy
of God. James4:4
Romans12:2 also commands those who follow Christ to be ‘Not conformed
to the world’ but be ‘transformed by the renewing of your mind!’ But the
passages speak of two entirely different aspects of conformity. The Romans
passage is using a word that means ‘be not conformed to the wisdom and spirit
or fashions of the age. But by your WHOLE TENOR or life and behavior reflect
Him that has renewed you into His own image. Thereby proving what is the good,
acceptable and perfect will of God really is. Otherwise your religion is in
Vain.
In these truths the essence of true religion is clearly seen by the
Life of God in the soul of man. Unless there is a continual increase of
conformity to godliness and purity in the soul of converted man, his profession
will decay and eventually become extinct. Failure to grasp these vital truths
of inward ‘renewal’ has created an anemic spiritual sickness among professing
Christians. Although many have indeed received the Word with gladness and
believed for a while, they have quickly decayed due to the lack of
understanding about the necessity of WORKING out their own salvation in fear
and trembling. The false teachers then weave a web of deadly deceit around them
that is almost impossible to penetrate once it has taken hold of the mind.
Loving not the world or the things of the world is essential to
continuing down the Narrow path to eternal life. Today most professing
Christians are under the impression that ‘once’ they have believed their
eternal destination is then predetermined in God and therefore guaranteed. But
nothing could be further from the truth. It requires ‘patient continuance’ or
‘steadfast endurance’ to inherit the kingdom, Rom2:7. No one waltzes into the
kingdom because he ‘once’ believed in Jesus. ‘The devils believed!’ Those who
have made themselves to be friends with the world, the inhabitants of the
earth, the children of men who are lost in their sins, have become enemies of
God.
The whole tenor of scripture speaks of this separation. ‘If the
world hate you, know that it hated Me before it hated you. If you were of the
world the world would love its own; but because you are NOT of the world, but I
have chosen you OUT of the world, therefore the world hates you.’ (Jh15:18) And
‘Marvel not, my brethren, if the world hates you. We know that we have passed
from death to life because we love the brethren.’ (1Jh3:13) Also Johns says,
‘We know that the WHOLE world is under the power of the wicked one!’ 1Jh5:19
Consequently our friendship of this system would provoke the anger of God
against us.
Those who are of God have departed from evil and study to do good,
they walk according to His commandments, with a sincere desire to please Him.
Depending on earthly relationships to advance a worldly purpose would be
contrary to everything Jesus taught about self denial and discipleship.
Many may suppose themselves Christians who have studied to build
friendships with the world for various reasons, but they deceive themselves in
the highest degree. NO ONE who is wrapped up in his selfish ambitions knows God
or is known of Him.
What kind of
Friendship are Christians to have with the World?
The command given by our Lord to love our neighbor as ourselves
remains as second only to loving God with all our hearts and strength. We are
to love mankind as our own soul, labor to do good unto all men and make every
effort to save them from everlasting destruction. We are to please others above
ourselves, think of others more highly than ourselves and do all within our
power to live at peace with them. In this manner we follow the example of our heavenly
Father who allows the sun to rise on the evil and the good and sends rain on
the just and unjust.
Keeping company with men of this world could not possible exclude
our obligation to converse with them on various topics of necessity. Otherwise
as Paul said, ‘you would need to go OUT of the world!’ (1Cor5:10) But as to the
manner of this conversation we need to take careful notice to not carry it too
far. (1) We are certainly permitted to converse with them in all matters
relating to business. (2) When courtesy also requires our response. (3) And
when we have a reasonable hope of doing them good.
Each of these instances requires great care on our part not to be
‘burned’ while striving to pluck others out of the fire. Because building a
close attachment with those who do not know God can become a snare to our soul.
Therefore we must NEVER delight in their company or engage in needless and
useless conversation with them just to please our flesh. To the measure we
partake of this diversion of equal measure will our souls be diminished in holy
tempers and desires to please the Lord. Building an alliance with worldly men
for whatever reason can only lead to disaster for the Children of God.
Above all else the Children of God should FEAR the very though of
entering in marriage with a non-believer. This is flatly forbidden in scripture
and extremely dangerous to the soul. That a truly regenerate person could
disobey this command and join with an unbeliever is beyond comprehension. Surly
this would be the extremity of spiritual adultery spoken of by James. The
dreadful consequences of such a union automatically will put you at odds with
God, which is a fearful place indeed.
One sin will inevitably lead to others, so this unholy union will
make you a partaker of another person’s sin. It breads complacency as it
gradually removes the abhorrence and dread of sin, making the soul easy prey to
temptation. Those who join in such a union will inevitably abandon diligent
obedience to the Word, prayer, fasting and fellowship. How easily will they
forget they were cleansed from their former sins and join again in backbiting,
evil speaking and gossip. Once their words were seasoned with salt and would
minister grace to the hearers, but now they grieve the Holy Spirit of God.
The deadly consequences of seeking the favor of the world whether
in business or in marriage are seldom spoken of in the pulpits today, but the
warnings stand firm in scripture as a reminder to those who wish to inherit
eternal life, ‘depart from iniquity!’
Do not be deceived, evil company corrupts good morals! (1Cor15:33)
Such is the nature of the infectious spirit of the world. When you associate
with the ungodly you are bound to catch their spirit, just as many forms of
disease spread by contagion, so evil manners tend to corrupt good habits. Many
may suppose themselves immune to this infection because they have once
believed, but the fact remains that the ungodly desire to mold their companions
after their own image. And they will use the utmost skill and cunning to do so,
thinking nothing of luring you into their snare. Therefore flee for your life
from close association with worldly men, lest the flame kindle upon you.
Close association with the ungodly also tends to inspire envy. Many
who make no profession of faith in Christ whatsoever are indeed highly
respectable and good natured people. There is a strong temptation to converse
intimately with them and feel that you are gaining useful knowledge in the
process, when in reality you are decreasing in holiness to the exact degree you
‘increase’ in the supposed knowledge. But how powerful is the lure of their
friendship. They appear harmless, return favor for favor and speak well of you
to others, but in spiritual matters they remain vacant. You admire their
generosity and humane spirit and quickly disregard the state of their souls,
whereby you stand accused before God for failure to warn them in love.
Among the most dangerous of worldly companions are those who make a
profession of faith and have some knowledge of religion while they know nothing
of its inward power to renew their heart. These can do the most damage to your
spiritual zeal and inward piety. Such persons may appear godly but will
subtlety draw you into spiritual decay by degrees, suggesting things contrary
to sound biblical doctrine. Beware of fellowship with anyone who does not seek
purity of heart or hunger for righteousness. Many have thus strayed from the
faith and turned aside to idle talk.
Being all things to all men, to win some, does not exclude the
necessity of keeping yourself tightly in check. Those you have assisted in the
temporal matters of life may esteem you and even ‘love’ you, but in returning
that love never forget their eternal good. Do not allow your intimacy with them
to dampen your fervent prayer for their soul. Keep the matter before God and
never lose focus of your calling.
As to
matters of family relationships the same rule applies. Undoubtedly husbands and
wives have the most intimate of relationships. They are bound together for
better or worse and must make the best of each other because what God has
joined, man must not separate. (unless by death or adultery) Parents are
equally bound to their young children and obligated to raise them in a godly
manner. But when they are grown and have made their own choice to forget the
things of God, prudence dictates that you treat them as you would any
unbeliever, with a loving and kind concern for their souls, but with a careful
watch not to be intimately involved in their vain conversations or amusements.
Remember, to the measure you partake together with the ungodly,
whether they are brothers, sisters or grown children, of equal measure will it
diminish your desire for personal holiness and hunger of righteousness.
Although you must not totally avoid contact with them, but tread carefully in
their presence lest you be burned.
To avoid spiritually adultery resolve to have no ‘intimacy’ with
worldly men. You may conduct your business with them and assist them as seems
fitting to the situation, but never leave your heart unguarded in matters of
the Spirit. Equally dangerous are the professing Christians who attempt to rob
your zeal by convincing you that overindulgence in spiritual matters is not a necessity
of faith. They will insist that you are ‘trying to save yourself’ and therefore
making void the free gift of grace. But stand firm! If you are to continue in
favor with God and inherit the kingdom, you must contend earnestly for the
faith once delivered to the saints and find the fellowship of others who call
upon God out of a pure heart.
The Word commands that Christians be separate and come out from
among the unclean in order to keep themselves pure and the message sound.
Otherwise the mixing together of darkness and light will dim the testimony of
the gospel. Therefore take great care in the manner you associate with the
ungodly. If you dine with them at your home out of necessity see that you do
not take occasion to carelessly drop your guard. Let no corrupt communication
come out of your mouth and do not allow yourself to be taken up in their
levity. As you have opportunity you should speak plainly and openly to your
worldly friends about spiritual matters and give them an ample amount of time
to either accept or reject the offer of Christ. But if after you have earnestly
made every honest attempt to persuade them of the better way and they still
refuse, begin slowly to break off contact with them by not encouraging their
visits. Further fellowship can only serve to erode your zeal for God on their
behalf and draw you into a spirit of compromise.
In the matter of relations, parents, children, etc, who do not love
or serve God, you are bound by blood to see them at least on occasion. But you
must be careful not to get intimately involved in their affairs. This will be
difficult because you love them so dearly and wish only the best. But keep the
matter constantly before God in fervent prayer and you will not lose focus.
Always remember it is their eternal souls at stake, you may be the only means
on earth by which God can reach them, don’t compromise your witness trying to
please the flesh.
Contact: Mike
DeSario, mike@antiosas,Qrg
330-945-6700